Dancing with the Stars Episode Recap: Monday, April 1, 2013
Break out your corsages and boutonnieres! It's Prom Night on Dancing with the Stars. Tom and Brooke are in their prom outfits from yesteryear, and they're glorious. You really can't get much better than a pastel puffy shirt plus hot ...
Break out your corsages and boutonnieres! It's Prom Night on Dancing with the Stars. Tom and Brooke are in their prom outfits from yesteryear, and they're glorious. You really can't get much better than a pastel puffy shirt plus hot pink scrunched dress. Also glorious? Brooke's gigantic, '80s teased hair. I can only wish my prom look aged like that.You can vote for tonight's prom king and queen via Twitter and the winners will get two arbitrary points added to their scores. Gimmicks and it's only Week 3!Aly Raisman and Mark Ballas: Viennese waltzAly is uber-confused by the six-count versus the four-four counts of her previous dances. "I feel like I'm back in math class," she says. For counting? Like preschool? Their "really cool surprise" is a dangling Cupid shooting arrows at both of them. That's so Mark. The routine is very sweet, and Aly doesn't have trouble keeping time. She's not a bonafide technician like Shawn was, but she's very fluid and natural. Len is not impressed like McKayla. "April Fool's!" he shouts. Thank God we got that out of the way. Bruno says she expresses emotion well, but wants her to watch her frame. Carrie Ann wants her to stay in character.Score: 23Andy Dick and Sharna Burgess: cha-chaAndy was homecoming king. What?! Sharna is rockin' a catsuit! Somewhere, Anne Hathaway is crying. Andy drops his breath freshener prop at the beginning and it throws him off for the rest of the routine. He's off-time, and it's sort of terrible overall, not to mention, not really a cha-cha, but it's infectious and hilarious as per yoosh. He ends by stripping off his shirt... and he's packin' a six-pack (of sprayed-on abs). Bruno loves the entertainment value. Carrie Ann loves that he tries. Seriously. "You're like a sneeze. You know it's coming and there's nothing you can do about it," Len says. "You make me feel good. ... Any connection to the cha-cha was a coincidence!"Score: 18Ingo Rademacher and Kym Johnson: paso dobleThis is Ingo's fantasy prom because his prom "was boring as sh--." That apparently includes riding in on a motorcycle and wearing a wife beater. So his fantasy is Grease 2. Sigh. This should've been a breakthrough dance for Ingo, but it's just there. He's aggressive and powerful, but there's no pop to the routine at all. He's also still rough around the edges technique-wise, which may or may not be due to his "grandpa" bones, but there's something that just isn't clicking yet with him. Carrie Ann wants his core to be stronger. Len wants more posture. Bruno says he needs refinement.Score: 21Lisa Vanderpump and Gleb Savchenko: Viennese waltzDesperate times. Lisa's more concerned with getting votes and Gleb is not helping with his "six" Twitter followers. So Lisa tweets out a shirtless picture of him. I can't argue with that. This is definitely much more Lisa's speed. Her footwork and frame still leave a lot to be desired, but she doesn't look like she's going to die of nerves for once, which is all we can ask for at this point. Len likes the feel of it. Bruno says she was much better, but points out her missed passes. Carrie Ann likes it, but wants her to stay in character.Score: 21Kellie Pickler and Derek Hough: jive"If my partner's capable, I definitely want to push them," Derek says. Hence the "Mad Wasp" face he makes when he's annoyed. Good one, Kellie. They dance to "Footloose," Where's Julianne when you need her? This is unsurprisingly the best routine so far. It's fast as hell and Kellie nails it all. She doesn't have enough bounce, but her flicks and kicks are on-point. She does, however, look like she's going to combust if she flubs. Bruno calls her sharper than a samurai sword. Carrie Ann calls it "ridiculously amazing." "You are officially the queen of the prom," Len declares.Score: 25Victor Ortiz and Lindsay Arnold: contemporaryLindsay asks what Victor's prom was like. He never went to prom because "I was broke." Awkward. It's the Night of the Bottom Two Comeback apparently. Who would've thought Victor's breakthrough would be contemporary? It's a gorgeous and smooth number, and these two actually have chemistry! Figures Lindsay, a So You Think Can Dance alum, will bring it for contemporary. Carrie Ann calls it breathtaking. Len is "pleasantly surprised." Bruno calls it unbelievable.Score: 23D.L. Hughley and Cheryl Burke: salsaD.L. didn't graduate high school, but he was a rent-a-prom-date for a rate of $25 back in 1981. Lucky ladies! They dance to "Sex Machine" and it's anything but. Poor D.L. He's just not meant to dance. He's stiff, wooden, and his hips can barely get out of fifth gear. "It was as untidy as a teenager's bedroom," Len says. Bruno says he looked like a case of hip replacement. Carrie Ann says he's making baby steps. "It's hard for me to move my hips because every time I do, a kid pops out," D.L. quips.Score: 16Jacoby Jones and Karina Smirnoff: rumbaJacoby went to prom last minute by himself and got kicked out. His high school is no more after Hurricane Katrina, so he's dedicating the dance in memory of his school. I love how the judges were basically challenging Jacoby last week to see if he can focus and bring it in a serious ballroom routine. Well, he does. It's a lovely, sensual number, and Jacoby's fluid and effortless. And shirtless. Bruno calls it brilliant. Carrie Ann says he has incredible artistry. Len loves the quality of movement.Score: 24Wynonna and Tony: sambaWynonna wants to unleash her inner tigress. So Tony throws in some pole-dancing and brings her to meet Def Leppard, as you would do. They're wearing their best Rock of Ages gear and year's worth of mascara, which are the only things rockin' about this. There's no tigress and if it's possible, Wynonna's regressing. She just dances so damn small. Seriously, she's like tiptoeing through this. I can probably sleepwalk faster. Carrie Ann calls it a "whisper." Len says she didn't move. Bruno says she's got to hit it hard.Score: 15Sean Lowe and Peta Murgatroyd: cha-chaSean hands out another rose - or a corsage, if you really want to be specific - to Peta. The Bachelor is over, guys! They're dancing to "YMCA," so Peta's the Indian chief and Sean's the construction worker. He looks as good as anyone would dancing in overalls. The routine's entertaining, and Sean, like Andy, tries so hard, but he's so awkward and gawky. He's sort of how I picture the Tin Man would dance. Len likes the attitude and calls it his best dance. Bruno wants him to work on his bookshelf. "There was one thing missing from that routine," Carrie Ann says. "Bruno." Oh, snap! Who wrote that one for her?Score: 21Zendaya and Val Chmerkovskiy: Viennese waltzZendaya's grandmother was recently diagnosed with breast cancer, so she's dedicating the dance to her grandma. She even gets to pick her song: "Que Sera Sera." Way to play favorites, ABC. I kid. Sort of. Zendaya kills it. Again. It's charming and lyrical. Some of her spins get a little out of control, but it's pretty polished overall. Bruno calls it beautiful. Carrie Ann loves her fluidity. Len is tired of the windmill arms.Score: 24So Kellie and Derek dethrone Zendaya and Val from the top with 25. And Wynonna and Tony dethrone D.L. and Cheryl from the bottom with 15.What did you think? Did you like Prom Night? Was Kellie the best of the night? Who would you crown king and queen? Does Derek look like a Mad Wasp? What was your prom like? What did you wear? (Me: Sage dress, got tiramisu on my wrap and met Orlando Jones afterward.) Who do you think will leave tomorrow?
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